if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
