READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
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I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
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I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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