Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
