Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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