I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
