This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
