I look better un-naked...
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize