I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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