I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize