I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize
