Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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