oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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