I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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