I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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