I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
