I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize