I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize