It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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