Do you still have your period?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
It's blow job season.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
