Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize