If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
