i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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