Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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