my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"