im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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