the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize