That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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