I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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