Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
