They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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