I wish you could order shots online.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize