D3 body, D1 cock
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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