Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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