Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
what day is it and did you see me today?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
We need to get me chipped asap
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
