You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
