Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
NoShamevember. You game?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize