Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just had sex bonerless
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize