who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
