god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
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