she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
