love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
