It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
