nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
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I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
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it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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