Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
