How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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