so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize