? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
