Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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