Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
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