i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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